It’s been a whole month since we moved to the West Coast. Would you believe me if I told you that it seems we have been living in La Jolla for many years? We were incredibly busy immersing ourselves in our new life and the boy took us a lot of time!
The first thing to mention is the completely different attitudes and lifestyles that are inherent in the daily lives of the locals. Unlike New York City, where everyone’s schedule is already full a few months in advance, La Jollans don’t compete in the “who’s busiest” game. In fact, they go with the flow and plan ahead just a few days in advance. No big notice is required and somehow it all works out harmoniously.
Second, the people of La Jolla are the most warm and welcoming people we have ever met. Not only are they willing to introduce themselves to others we know, they are too Interested Not so. We have been introduced Lots Man actually, I had to cancel the plan with a new connection this week because our schedule was starting to flood too much (no worries, I’ll reschedule!). We’ve already had a double date, social event just for two parents, a small house party, and lots of dates with kids who are similar in age to our parents. We have been invited to dinner next week where we will be introduced to another family and have a housewarming party next week as well. We’ve even been invited to a “party-party” that looks like it could bring a wild night for us! I never thought it would be so easy to start meeting people in a new town. Yet, the openness and kindness of the people here has allowed us to plunge directly into a new social life.
Let’s talk about the kindness we show to the people here. Our son celebrated his birthday last month. She has formed a new circle of friends through her high school sports team and spent a lot of time with these new friends in August. On his birthday he spent the last part of the day with his new friends at a friend’s house. The mother of this friend, whom I have not yet met, bought our son a birthday cake and sang it to him in his New Year with his new friends. In my experience, this is an unheard of gesture but since I spend more time here, I realize that this is quite common behavior in our new community. The residents here are quite remarkable.
We had some obstacles to get our kids into the water. Remember, our kids are swimming in their sea The whole life. Unfortunately, they quickly learned about the population of Stinger on the nearby coast and refused to swim despite everyone’s encouragement that they would be fine as long as they remained “random”. A couple of weeks ago we Finally Brought a success and personally witnessed a miracle when the three of them jumped into the sea and jumped on the waves in sports as they have done since childhood. For a moment, I was really worried that we had moved to a beach town and that our children would never swim in the ocean! It was a big obstacle in our house and fortunately we overcame it. On the other hand, I refuse to dive into the water. Not because of the fear of stingrace but simply because the water temperature is too cold for me. I love swimming in the ocean and looking at the ancient, aquatic waters without my knees seemed quite difficult. Maybe I should invest in a wet suit soon.
Our children have influenced us the most in their ability to pass so perfectly. Our boys have signed up for sports in which they have never participated and our daughter has been accepted into the competitive dance troupe. The kids spend the first few weeks of August in their proper camps, meeting new friends and most importantly roaming freely. In New York City we didn’t let them travel more than our local park. This freedom was only given to our boys because many scary men hiding in the streets of New York City allow an eleven year old girl to walk alone. Even our boys were never allowed to roam the city on the subway, not even an Uber for safety reasons. Here, they are free to roam as they please and they meet themselves on their electric scooters while zipping in and out of school and meeting friends at various destinations nearby.
I’m still learning to feel comfortable behind the wheel. Achieving confident driving skills is my biggest obstacle right now. I drove myself to the village and around La Jolla (which I haven’t driven in thirteen years considering it a huge success!). It’s not hard to feel comfortable on the road here because every turn has a stop sign and the speed limit is at a constant limit of 25 miles per hour but I’m still getting used to this new skill. However, I want to broaden my horizons and get a sense of freedom on the streets outside of La Jolla. It’s been a month. Baby steps.
The weather is incredible. I often need a layer with me, even in August. My body has become accustomed to the summer temperatures that reach the nineties so seventy degrees sometimes feels quite cold!
Life was really different. I was forced to learn not to expect a quick response and not plan much in advance. But these lessons I totally welcome. I’ve learned that if my kids ’sense of fashion and their new interests change too quickly to adapt to life on the West Coast, I also have the opportunity to be flexible and take myself to new heights. They inspired me and amazed me at how quickly they adapted.
Instead of pigeons, we now see hummingbirds and cardinals fluttering their wings. Instead of the Hudson River, we have the Pacific Ocean on our horizon. Instead of black dress and heels, I am wearing flat and colorful dress. Instead of flying hair and polished nails, I proudly don my curls and wave my hands in their natural state.
The thing that puts the most pressure on my mind about this huge move is that if we hadn’t done it, we would always have convinced ourselves that New York City was the right place for us. And at that time NYC was the perfect place for us and could be for decades to come. When we do not know what we are missing, we are safe in a state of ignorance that assures us that our situation is best for us. True though, there is Lots A situation that has a positive effect on all of us. The most dangerous risk is to be complacent or to convince ourselves that we need to be on a certain path that really limits our potential and life to its maximum potential, wouldn’t you agree? Picking and moving is not easy. It was a terribly difficult decision for us. We’re only a month away and I can already say that this will be one of the best decisions we’ve ever made. I hope to move again, and again, and again in my lifetime. Now that I have discovered this great mystery, I know that although we will be happy in San Diego for many years to come, there is a whole world where there are other wonderful places where we can be happy too. With each step comes new changes, new experiences and most excitingly new I!