A tired voice actor sets foot in a Hollywood studio soundbooth. Maybe it’s Will Arnett. It’s probably Will Arnett.
Will Arnett sip his coffee, slide his headphones and speak into the microphone, aiming at his maker and saying: “Okay, Frankie, what are we doing today? More cups of rice?”
“No, Will, we have something new for you. This, this is a Coldplay ad.
Will Arnett closes his eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose.
“Yeah, I know, they’ve got a new record or something,” Frankie says. “Let’s give it a try. Maybe it looks like a 90s movie trailer guy. You can even voice Lego Batman!
“Jesus Christ,” Arnett muttered, looking at his watch. “Okay, let’s do it.”
Tape rolls, he begins.
“This fall is coming: They The most successful pop-rock band of the 21st century. He Made almost every superstar in the last 20 years. Now Coldplay and Max Martin have joined forces to create an album that is highly anthemically and deeply generic, suitable only for football stadiums and the target electronics division. Still for sale – Sphere song! ”
Before we move on, you shouldn’t feel bad about stinging at Coldplay – you can’t hurt them. It’s like making fun of Jeff Bezos ’cowboy hat. The man still went to Choda’s place.
Coldplay’s ninth studio LP, Friday, similarly aims to trap listeners through the glory of heavenly travel (or something). According to singer Chris Martin, the new project was partially inspired Star wars And “wondering what musicians around the world are like”. In May, the band premiered its very earthy lead single “High Power” on the International Space Station through direct connections to real astronauts. Martin said he hopes to act on the moon one day.
This all seems silly because it certainly is. But after the hyper-serious social commentary of 2019 Daily life – The band’s first record in 15 years didn’t sway for the nostrils – they could carry some absurdity, especially at this surreal time.
The band and super producer Max Martin (Taylor Swift, Britney Spears, Katy Perry) are both playing with house money, driven by a common feeling: Spears does exactly what they have to do: the next concert to punch two or three easily digestible mega-jams Setlist. On Thursday, the 2022 Global Stadium tour was announced.
Lead single, “high capacity,” perfectly serviceable; Another populist-optimistic music, adorned with free synths and bash, that can slide smoothly between “Paradise” and “Stay full of sky”. The second, which may become ubiquitous in the consideration of his staff, is the collaboration with “My Universe”, the K-pop god BTS. Again, this is a planet-sized song with an instantly humble hook. An album track called “Humankind” follows the same maximum blueprint, and may gain some traction.
The rest, well, the rest. Four of the 12 tracks are intimate or faceless dance instruments. A beautiful rock ballad should have been cut in half with the vague consent of “Coloratura”, Elton John’s “Rocket Man” and / or David Bowie’s “Spaceman” around 10 minutes long. “Late Somebody Go” with Selina Gomez is good but forgettable. The R&B pairing with We Are King and Jacob Collier originally played a capella “Human Heart”, an undercooked forest ivory tribute. And the crunchy rocker “People of the Pride” is a painfully muse facial.
To the credit of the band and Martin, the album sounds great overall, especially on the lower end. It is abundantly delicious, rich.
But is it an important contribution to pop or rock conversations, even the band’s own catalog? Special. Like everything starting from Coldplay Milo Xyloto (2011), if not earlier, these songs have very little anchoring. There is no purpose, no solidarity, no mental account.
All of these are just rainbow puffs floating in the ether, piercing the atmosphere and orbiting the earth forever, like sonic space junk.